Here is a beta service [ Google Romance ] from Google, announced on April 1, 2006.
With Google Romance, you can:
- Upload your profile “tell the world who you are, or, more to the point, who
you’d like to think you are, or, even more to the point, who you want others to think you are.
- Search for love in all (or at least a statistically significant majority of) the right places with Soulmate Search, our eerily effective psychographic matchmaking software.
- Endure, via our Contextual Dating option, thematically appropriate multimedia advertising throughout the entirety of your free date.
And here are the steps you have to follow to get your true love:
- Uploading Your Profile
You’ll begin your Google Romance romance by uploading your profile.
Note: those who generally favor the throw enough stuff at the wall approach to online dating might find it useful to employ our Batch Profile Uploading option.
- Meeting Your Soulmate
When you do a Soulmate Search, your deeply personal and potentially life-altering search results are produced solely by computer algorithm, without human intervention of any kind.
Note: depending on your personality, you may or may not find this reassuring.
- Contextual Pre-Date Advertising
It’s important to all of us on the Google Romance team that the ads you see during your Contextual Date be useful and enjoyable, not intrusive and annoying.
- Meeting for Drinks
Your Contextual Date will begin with drinks at a participating upscale neighborhood bistro.
- Don’t forget that Google Mobile offers numerous opportunities for impressing your date with quick references to news headlines, factoids and tidbits.
- The Main Course
As part of our effort to make your romantic endeavors more useful and relevant, we can collect information about your Contextual Dating habits in order to focus every aspect of your Contextual Date on your (and your potential soulmate’s) particular strengths and weaknesses, likes and dislikes, turn-ons and turn-offs.
Note: We only amass, data-crunch and wield your Personal Contextual Dating History with your permission, and when you’re signed in to your Google Account.
- Unexpected Results
We’re constantly working to improve the quality of your Contextual Dating results. If you encounter inaccurate, disappointing or otherwise cosmically unfair romantic results that you’d like to bring to our attention, please submit a report here.
- Contextual Dating Advice
Got pressing questions about your Contextual Date?Â More than 500 carefully screened Contextual Dating Advisors are ready to answer your question for as little as $2.50 (per minute), usually within 24 hours and conceivably much, much sooner, depending on your levels of personal desperation and financial werewithal and the quality of your GPS signal and mobile plan.
- Contextual Courtship
And you’ll live happily, and contextually, ever after.
- Cupid’s Algorithms.
- Grow Brain
- Laugh, dammit.
- Google Courts Desperately Seeking Singles, And Many Others
- Brandon Burley
Caution: High expectations may result in good laugh in the end.